Should be working but can't focus. Instead I am: Blogging (no shit), eating, reading other blogs, reading the news, checking my phone, IGNORING the huges piles of coursework I'm surrounded by.
It's like there are two lives and two me's existing in parallel. There's cancer me; off work for treatment, no motivation, no focus. I'm not quite sure who she is, or even if I like her. Then theres the real me, still at work, thinking about what to put up for display (language techniques, connective words), thinking about RT who wants to come back to improve his coursework, thinking about which books to mark next. I have a feeling: cancer me has been introduced into the equation to TEACH me something. Something about my work not being my whole life, about stopping to get some work/life balance. It's HARD though. I'm bad at real life, I'm good at being a teacher. It is (despite the 80 hour working week) easier to focus on things I know I can do well and hard to stop to do the things I'm less good at.
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