Wednesday, back at work. This time I’m not as brave about it, with the kids. I’d fully intended to cover all of my year 11 lessons, leaving the new year 9’s and 10’s to the supply teacher. It turns out though, that given the likelihood of my 6 month absence, that I’m not up to saying goodbye to them for so long. I want to, but every time I think about it, it makes me cry. I’m not overly bothered about leaving my colleagues (sorry folks!) despite their huge kindnesses and support at this time, I really don’t feel unduly worried about the younger kids either, but when I think of someone else taking over my lovely year 11’s, I’m a mess.
After the third bout of tears, I decide that I’m really not up to it. The supply says she doesn’t mind having them (DVD) so I leave her to it. I feel as if I’m skiving, letting them down, being selfish. But I really don’t want to cry in front of them because they’ll guess how serious things are.
Instead, I concentrate on getting stuff together for the supply. There’s loads to pass on to her, so this really does fill the rest of my week. Fortunately, because otherwise I’d have had far too much time to think.
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